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Caring for Elderly Parents

Name: Andrew
Email: sensitiveman@cliffhanger.com
Date: 08 Sep 2002
Time: 07:54:15

Story

I am a (over) senstive person.

My sensitivity used to be applied by a Machiavellian boss firstly within the core of our organiation and latterly on special projects both for our own organisation and on request for other local and national public sector organisations. Near to the end of my boss's career I came across a secret budget that he had implemented and I refused to co-operate. I spent months just turning up for work and doing nothing before he realised I was not going to walk away. After his retirement I tried unsuccessfully to tarnish his halo but managed to do more harm to my reputation. Then eighteen months after his retirement I uncovered some hidden subsidies he had introduced into his beloved staff car scheme. This time instead of walking away I sought to expose theses subsidies but the new management tried to stop me but I would not be denied. Life after that was very difficult as I was picked on and I eventually walked away.

I have never been able to adjust from being highly respected to being rejected whilst maintaining the same high principles. As I became more bitter and alienated my partner dropped me when her ex-fiancee came back looking for her. I had to seek refuge with my elderly parents and as their health as deteriorated I have become their carer especially as Dad was diagnosed as being terminally ill in April of this year.

In July my sister came down to help with some of the more detailed aspects of household cleaning (not my forte) and on her final day started to moan about some of her friends having second holiday homes whilst she did not. As someone who has become technically homeless because of his principles I asked her not to talk about this subject as it was painful to me. She argued that she had every right to talk about her friends and a huge row ensued. We have not spoken since and I found myself looking after one housebound and one terminally parent with no support from my siblings. The great irony is that both my sisters are closer to my parents than I am and yet it fals to me to underpin their independence. My bitterness towards my sisters grows by the day and I forsee a situation where I may not even be able to attend my father's funeral.

Last changed: October 20, 2003

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