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From: Martina Robinson
Email: cripfemme@compuserve.com
Date: 23 Aug 1998
Time: 01:46:48
Remote Name: hd31-041.hil.compuserve.com
Remote User:
Love is most life changing experience of anyone's life, at least in my opinion, especially when you find yourself falling for someone you never thought you would. That's what happened to me. I fell in love with my personal assistant.
Suddenly, as a then 19-year-old, heterosexual, radical crip, everything I understood about the world changed. A year and half later, I had managed to deal with being bisexual.
However, I still couldn't deal with liking a non-disabled person. After all, my disabled friends kept telling me, and I mostly believed, that all able-bodied people who wanted to date disabled people actually wanted to abuse and control them. I knew people who that had happened to and I worried about it. There was also the matter of social shunning. In my social circles, it's not cool to date an able-bodied person. It made you an "AB wanna-be". In other words, a disabled person who wants to be able-bodied. I knew people like that, too, and I certainly didn't want to seen as one.
So, mostly I avoided introducing her to my friends or I lied and said she was my personal assistant. This arrangement suited me and my friends who, although they could have figured out what was going on if they had tried, preferred being in denial.
My girlfriend, however, had justifiable problems being my personal assistant in public and my girlfriend behind closed doors. About two weeks ago, I decided, for about the thousandth time since we started going out, that I couldn't handle the situation. To my surprise, when I had gotten over this, she decided she couldn't handle me not handling it.
Now, I guess our relationship is over. I miss her and I love her dearly. If I ever get I chance to tell her, I'll take it. Cross your fingers!
From: Danny
Email:
Date: 11 Apr 2008
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