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To be or not to be......

From: Maryanne
Email: m.stout@m.stout.screaming.net
Date: 05 Dec 2000
Time: 14:42:00
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I suppose that sharing my story will help me to heal the pain I feel. In 1995, a liver biopsy revealed an infection and damaged liver tissue hepatitis C.

I have suffered ill-health since the age of 17. Anytime I went to the doctor I was told it was nothing, go home and get some rest. In 1983, my parents had me sectioned because I spent most of my time sleeping and was unwilling to work (I felt too ill). I was sent home from the hospital with a diagnosis of Schzophenia and tons of medication. I didn't get any better but moved out of home. For years the decline of my health continued. In 1987, renal failure and two weeks in intensive care -- still didn't move the doctors to diagnose anything -- until I had three HIV tests which eventually showed the Hepatitis C virus in my system.

Thank God I was HIV negative. However, hepatitis has ruined my life and I feel very sad that all those years I was ignored by doctors and hospitals and had to suffer so much until eventually I uncovered the virus myself. The hell I have been through has been somewhat relieved by a 48-week course of interfon, but I still have the virus, and, although on good days I can almost forget I am ill, I cannot forgot the suffering and humiliation and despair I suffered before the diagnosis.

I pray that what happened to me will not happen to others and somehow I can smile through the tears.

Thank you

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