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Under what circumstances have you felt disadvantaged due to your
disability?
What did you do about it?
[ Break Out home | Contents | Search | Post | Reply | Next | Previous | Break Out story ]
Name: Liz Seger
Email: lizzys54@yahoo.com
Date: 18 Aug 2001
Time: 13:09:54
Remote Name: proxy.iaw.on.ca
Remote User:
Oh, my, Andrea, you've had phenomenal bad luck, but God doesn't hate you -- he doesn't hate anyone. That's a myth. Nor are you a punishment from God, so don't let anyone ever convince you of this, either. I think we come to this life to learn, to grow, to appreciate, to become something more than a shell of dust from which we are formed.
I am sorry about your fiancée but better to have found out before the marriage than have a brother-in-law emotionally abuse you and his brother for many years.
Medicine is improving things every day and maybe right now there's nothing can be done for your various conditions, but that doesn't mean it won't discover something soon or in a year or five years or 10.
All of us with disabilities have those days when we think no one cares about us. I know, for a fact, able-bodied, very successful people have days like that, and I bet, if you thought about it, you could name a dozen as well.
I'm no doctor. I have a bachelor's degree in psychology and spent years teaching children with disabilities, learning disabilities and physical disabilities. I think you are having a depressive episode and may have been having one for several years. Talk frankly to your family doctor about how negative you are feeling. There is help -- new medicines to lift your mood that don't have awful side effects, and having a depressive disorder is NOT the stigma it used to be. Many famous people like Rosie O'Donnel to Mike Wallace to Winston Churchill and Abe Lincoln suffered from depression. There is help out there. Do what you can to get it. After all, it's YOUR life, and, if YOU won't advocate for YOU, why would you think anyone else would?
Next start a gratitude journal. Each night before you go to bed, write five good things that happened to you that day. They don't have to big things but little, every-day things -- like you didn't have pain for an hour, your pet came and gave you loving kisses, someone smiled at you and said hello, you didn't get any bills in the mail that day. The sun shone in the morning, the moon was beautiful -- any and all kinds of things.
By looking for things to be grateful and appreciative for every day, it might just lift your mood and change the way you look at the world.
Next, you say you have no friends, and why is that? Are you housebound so you can't get out? You have a computer. Connect with any of the online discussion groups that suit your interest. What do you like to do? What kind of music do you listen to? How can you be of help to someone else and also help yourself at the same time?
When you do go out, do you smile at people and say good morning etc. or do you look like you have the wrath of God on your face, scowling, head down, not making eye contact?
When you talk with people, is it always about you and your complaints or do you let others talk? Do you listen actively to what others are saying or concentrate so hard on your next utterance or pronouncement that you don't hear or really give a darn what the other person is saying.
It seems harsh to say, but, if you start looking help other people and not be so caught up in your problems and your life and how much God hates you, you might find that there are other people in the world who have far greater problems than yours -- which make yours look like a pittance. In other words, Andrea, get over yourself.
You, and you alone, choose how you live your life, your attitudes, how you feel or don't feel. You can be bitter and negative about your life but, in the immortal words of Dr. Phil McGraw, how's that working for you? Apparently not well. So try something else; go in another direction. Try being proactive instead of negative. You might just surprise yourself.
Life's hard. No one said it was gonna be a cake walk. You take abuse from people, why? If you don't respect and love yourself enough to say stop, then why are you surprised to be treated that way? You're in control of your life; no one else.
No one in this life owes anyone anything. Along with rights, comes responsibility. If you are not getting what you need from one rehab counselor, go to that person's superior and, if they can't help you, go to someone higher up still. They all can't be blithering idiots. Do research yourself on the computer about what vocational rehab should be giving you. Don't wait on someone else to tell you what they think you should be able to get.
Your attitudes about who you are and what your life is is more of a handicap than your disability will ever be. Change how you approach your life, yourself, your life and you will change. But you have to want to change and it's work and there'll be no one to blame but yourself if you screw up. But, if you do screw up, so what? You pick yourself up, dust yourself off and start all over again.
I'll let you in on a secret: it's not "them" versus "us." It's "you, me and, we." And it doesn't matter whether we're disabled or abled-bodied -- no one gets out of this life alive. It's hard for everyone, and don't you pooh pooh it -- because it is. You aren't privy to what everyone else's life is like behind closed doors. What it seems to be isn't always what it is.
Copyright © 2001 Liz Seger. All rights reserved.
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