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How have you effectively prevented paternalism from damaging your self image?

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Re: Paternalism

Name: Eddie Hunt
Email: EWHunt@Prodigy.net
Date: 27 Oct 2000
Time: 21:29:44

Story

Shelley, my name is Eddie Hunt. I am quadriplegic, paralyzed from my neck-down. I read your article with a bit of semantic humor.

Please understand that I, too, have experienced over-zealous "helpers" for the past 17 years who assert their "helping" on every disabled human being whom they encounter. My answer is always accompanied by a "Thank you." My answer may be, "Yes, thank you, you may help me this way or that way." Or it may be, "No, but thank you for asking."

The rescuers, as you label them, who "help" before asking simply need guidance from you on how to help you or not (e.g., "Thank you, but I can manage." Or, "Thank you, yes, you may help this way or that way.").

What you call paternalism, I call community involvement; and I would never say, "Oh, no thanks, I'm beyond help." Those who try to help you are doing just that -- trying to help you. You need to guide them on how to do just that. Your idiom, "I'm beyond help," may just be where you will find yourself one day when your community sees you stuck in a situation but decides you are beyond help and walks by you and away from you.

Send your wonderful people my way. We appreciate those who take their time to help us.

Eddie

Copyright © 2000 Eddie Hunt. All rights reserved.

Last changed: April 20, 2004

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